1. You know that feeling when people who only think of emotional shosha start talking to you? It feels like bird poop penetrated through the pores of your brain and dirtied the whole thing fully. You know?
2. You know that feeling when you hate everyone because no one really loves you because you're disgusting or maybe not?
3. You know that feeling when you, YOU, who has never missed anything except facebook when away from friends and family, that YOU, actually begin missing your family, parents, brother, sister, sab kuch?
4. You know that feeling when you think your heart is a shit stuffed bag of tears?
5. You know that feeling when you feel you've faked everything all your life, that you've pretended coolness, happiness, bindaasness for so long, people actually detest you if that armor cracks once in a while, and they move on to the funny people of the moment then. You know?
6. You know that feeling when you just want to drink and drink and drink some more, and then go out and tell everyone what you actually think of them, that they're hot and you want to kiss them, that they're cute and you want to kiss them, that they suck and you want to gaand pe laato them, that you're awesome so please love back?
7. You know that morbid, fearful feeling, when you get eve-teased by three bikers and shout back "madarchod" in tashan, but you know you're fuck scared and rape may happen any moment?
8. You know that feeling when your scalp starts bloody bleeding because of winter dryness and people in college notice and tell you about it?
9. You know that feeling when your crush gives you nothing but a bored "hey" and you've been dreaming he'd ask you out because you dressed so well today?
10. You know that feeling when you discover, suddenly, that food is not making you happy any longer, and that appetite is dying and dying sand dying?
11. You know that feeling when you just want to hug your mother and just live in the warmth of love and validation?
12. You know that feeling when you fear being judged?
13. You know that feeling when the person you've loved the most all your life, the person you've shared everything with, the person who knows your real self like no other, when that person turns out to be nothing but an illusion, a farce, and suddenly everything is lost?
14. You know that feeling when you're crying in the night, fearing someone you love may commit suicide any moment, wondering what you can do about it?
15. You know that feeling when there's no love anywhere?
16. You know that feeling when you're so devastated only God can help?
17. You know that feeling when you're just painfully, intensely, unusually, sad?
18. You know that feeling when you want to drink and drink and drink and DRINK?
19. You know that feeling when you want someone with you, someone who's like you, someone who loves you even when you're a solitude-loving, boring, non-risk-taking, cribbing, crying, idiotic, bitchy, stabby, messy, dirty-minded, desperate, selfish, non-fun-loving, shanti-loving, sex-loving, money-loving, ambitious, jealous, dark, unfunny little whore, because that probably what you really are?
20. You know that feeling when you're a total stranger to your own self, your activities are dictated by some manipulative corner of your brain, you cannot love anyone, no one loves you, everything is dhokha, naatak, etc etc?
You know?
2. You know that feeling when you hate everyone because no one really loves you because you're disgusting or maybe not?
3. You know that feeling when you, YOU, who has never missed anything except facebook when away from friends and family, that YOU, actually begin missing your family, parents, brother, sister, sab kuch?
4. You know that feeling when you think your heart is a shit stuffed bag of tears?
5. You know that feeling when you feel you've faked everything all your life, that you've pretended coolness, happiness, bindaasness for so long, people actually detest you if that armor cracks once in a while, and they move on to the funny people of the moment then. You know?
6. You know that feeling when you just want to drink and drink and drink some more, and then go out and tell everyone what you actually think of them, that they're hot and you want to kiss them, that they're cute and you want to kiss them, that they suck and you want to gaand pe laato them, that you're awesome so please love back?
7. You know that morbid, fearful feeling, when you get eve-teased by three bikers and shout back "madarchod" in tashan, but you know you're fuck scared and rape may happen any moment?
8. You know that feeling when your scalp starts bloody bleeding because of winter dryness and people in college notice and tell you about it?
9. You know that feeling when your crush gives you nothing but a bored "hey" and you've been dreaming he'd ask you out because you dressed so well today?
10. You know that feeling when you discover, suddenly, that food is not making you happy any longer, and that appetite is dying and dying sand dying?
11. You know that feeling when you just want to hug your mother and just live in the warmth of love and validation?
12. You know that feeling when you fear being judged?
13. You know that feeling when the person you've loved the most all your life, the person you've shared everything with, the person who knows your real self like no other, when that person turns out to be nothing but an illusion, a farce, and suddenly everything is lost?
14. You know that feeling when you're crying in the night, fearing someone you love may commit suicide any moment, wondering what you can do about it?
15. You know that feeling when there's no love anywhere?
16. You know that feeling when you're so devastated only God can help?
17. You know that feeling when you're just painfully, intensely, unusually, sad?
18. You know that feeling when you want to drink and drink and drink and DRINK?
19. You know that feeling when you want someone with you, someone who's like you, someone who loves you even when you're a solitude-loving, boring, non-risk-taking, cribbing, crying, idiotic, bitchy, stabby, messy, dirty-minded, desperate, selfish, non-fun-loving, shanti-loving, sex-loving, money-loving, ambitious, jealous, dark, unfunny little whore, because that probably what you really are?
20. You know that feeling when you're a total stranger to your own self, your activities are dictated by some manipulative corner of your brain, you cannot love anyone, no one loves you, everything is dhokha, naatak, etc etc?
You know?
You Know that feeling when you feel a person is having same taste as you and approach to be a friend.. But when there is no reply....
ReplyDeleteYes. :)
ReplyDeleteSuper post. Sharp. Cuts.